I thought it would be easier if we could just make a newspaper, but it turned out that Miss Yu changed her mind and we had to make news, either radio or video. I don't want to complain about the burden, but it really was something. Writing is the priority, but with the video shooting and editing, there was no much time for correcting writing grammar and fulfill all of the requirements.
The difficulty of this project itself was not the main cause for my discomfort for this project. I work with three fantastic teammates, Celia, Jim Chen and Matthew. They are all very talented, Matthew is very creative, Celia has a lot of wonderful ideas in mind and Jim is always willing to make contributions. Somehow, I became the group leader, even though there was no official announcement about this. Through the project, my biggest weakness was exposed into the air, and that really made me uncomfortable and depressed. I found that I was overly self-centered that I could not work well in a group. It was hard for me to accept ideas that I could not approve of, even though the ideas were sometimes better for the overall project. This weakness of mine really lessened the overall quality of our project and if I made Celia, Jim or Matthew uncomfortable working with me, then, I have to apologize.
Another thing was that I started to doubt my leadership. I kept emphasizing a good leader should know how to utilize each person's strength in the team. Well, from that perspective, I am really not a good leader. I felt I couldn't trust anybody else except for myself. That prevented me from distributing jobs. As a result, I put extra work on myself, feeling tired, exhausted, while started feeling unconfident.
All of these problems exposed were so necessary for me to correct and improve, because this society is interdependent, I can't work on myself with a computer all the time. It is good to realize the problems at this time though, I hope is not too late.
1 comment:
A very powerful reflection. Not everyone can admit being self-centered and unable to trust others. I'm proud of you for being able to say it. Because you have realized this, you will now be able to improve. You are now ready to grow as a person. I am very proud of you!
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